$5 Films: The Blog!

In the beginning, there was 0; but all of a sudden, there was 1. 1 got lonely, and thus, 10. 10 decided to make a friend, thus 11. 11 were happy, until 1 decided to move on, and became 100. Once again, 100 was lonely, so it made another friend, and became 101. 1 decided was in love with 100, and they both became 110. 110 had a child, and they all became a happy family, 111.

   So 100 decided to get a job, and became 1000 every day. Every day he would come home to his wife, making 1001, and just as 1000’s child got home, 1000’s wife left to get some groceries, making 1010. Later on, 1000’s wife came home, making 1011. Their son left to his friends house, making 1100. He came home, making 1101. 1 grew one year older, and that made 1110, and in the meantime, 1000 and his wife had another child, making 1111.

   One day, when 1000 came home, he saw that his wife was having an affair with the neighbor, and he decided to move on, making 10000. He made a friend, making 10001, and as the years passed by, he and his friend grew a stronger friendship, represented by 10010. Soon, 10000 got a girlfriend, and every once in a while, she came over to his and his friend’s little parties, making 10011.

   But alas, his girlfriend broke up with him, but his friend tried to comfort him, and their friendship got stronger, making 10100. His friend got a girlfriend, making 10101, and they eventually got married, making 10110. His friend had a kid, making 10111, but he and his friend would usually hang out with each other, making 11000.

   One day, 10000’s friend brought his son, making 11001, and sometimes he invited 10000 to his house, with his wife, while his son was at school, making 11010. When their son got home, making 11011, 10000 would say goodbye, and leave, making 11100 for 10000’s friend and his family.

   One night, 10000’s friend invited him to dinner with his family, making 11101. 10000 went to the restroom and came back, making 11110. Just then, one of the boy’s friends came over, making 11111. After having a nice time, 10000 went back to his house, making 100000. He soon got a girlfriend, making 100001, and whenever she left, 10000 called his friend and told him about her, making 100010.

   10000 invited his friend over when he was with his girlfriend one day, making 100011, and at the end of the day, his friend went home, making 100100. They eventually got married and had a child, making 100101. One day, their child came home from school, crying, and hugged his mother, making 100110. His mother asked what was wrong, and her son replied that he had been bullied. His mother suggested that he call his friend over, and he did, making 100111. The boy’s friend suggested that he and the boy sleep over at his house, leaving just 10000 and his wife, making 101000.

   The next day, the boy called his parents to be picked up, making 101001, and then was brought to school. Later that day, the boy came home, and asked his parents what the answer was, and his father replied:

101010

It’s been a long time since I’ve actually posted up a review; lately, I’ve just been showing off screens, videos, and talking about flooded Wal Marts, but now, in the (rather late) spirit of Christmas (or ‘the holidays’ for you sensitive types), I’m finally able to bring about my weekly rant.

For some reason, me and Shawn have been unable to do the weekly rant last week, for two reasons: First, the obvious reason, which is that we were celebrating Christmas, and second, the fact that I can’t get on my youtube account because A. I forgot it, or B. someone hacked into it and changed it. Anyway, I’m going to start on that rant now.

Christmas is a very celebrated and beloved holiday, and who (besides people who don’t ‘observe’ Christmas) doesn’t love it? You get presents, you get off work/school, and you get to feel good about yourself by getting presents for others. Although, lately, Xmas (I’m changing it now; I’m tired of explaining the wussyness of people who fear the word ‘Christ’ and I’m making the typing easier for myself) has been overmarketed.

The market loves the holidays. They make loads of money from Xmas shopping, and they don’t have to pay for legal rights to Xmas songs, since back when most of them were made, the copyright system wasn’t established. The only problem is they overdo it too much, mostly by changing the lyrics around to fit what their point is to the commercial. It’s the kind of stuff that make my parents go “Ugh, it just makes me sick”. 

There are also some people who go about thinking that Christmas is too materialistic, and that people shouldn’t have presents. That brings me to my main point: Christmas is all about the presents; in fact, it’s the one day (or two; think Christmas eve) that people, and to be more specific, Christians get to go against everything that makes them Christian without making them feel guilty, or even being guilty.

Think about it. The want for presents, that’s greed; the huge Christmas feasts, that’s gluttony; that yearning for that Hi-Def TV you’ve always wanted, that you’re friend got, when instead you get socks, that’s envy. These are a few of the seven deadly sins that would normally be punisheable for Christians, but are instead, on Christmas, celebrated and embraced; and all you have to do is get someone a present, and you’re good to go.

Anyway, in coldclusion, here’s the scoop: If you’re a Christian, or if you’re one of those people that think that Christmas shouldn’t be about the presents, just dive into all of your desires; don’t worry, God’s cool with it!

Soory, I don’t mean those spooky perasites from the Halo series, I mean that it’s flooded here like mad. There are supposed to be record high flood levels, too! Oh boy.

Safeway is getting record business because the Wal*Mart and K-Mart near by are closed down for some reason, and everyone’s stocking up for the flood.

By the way, if you happen to be in Washington State, drop by Destinesia. We’re probably going to be open since everyone’s going to be stranded near there…

There comes a time when advertising, as the title suggests, crosses the line between annoying and flat-out retarded. Companies and products like like Mountain Dew, with it’s recent “DEWmocracy” ad campaign, and Doritos, which is planning on making an Xbox Live Arcade game about chips, are doing back-flips over that line.

Mountain Dew’s “DEWmocracy” thing could have just stopped at “make your own Mt. Dew flavor”, but it went and made the worst 4 minutes of advertising anyone has ever seen since the 70’s - late 80’s period of advertising; I never thought it was possible…

Doritos has decided to add an “edgy” feel to it’s nacho-cheesiness by letting people think up Doritos based games for the company’s apparently newly developed “game team” to make an Xbox Live Arcade game. Seriously, I have no comments on that one.

And Geico has outdone itself. For one, it can’t stick to one friggin’ ad campaign, and for another, one of those has been turned into a TV series on ABC, called Cavemen, which is about some, you guessed it, neanderthals living in modern times, facing prejudice. Sweet Jebus.

All I have to say is, wow, just wow…